What is Mommy Shaming?

Mommy shaming... What is it really?

The idea behind it is mothers need to stop shaming other mothers, and start uplifting and supporting them instead.

Sounds great right! The theory makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside! 

Except that's not how this is playing out... Mommy Wars has become synonymous with "Don't ever say anything I might not like." Cries of "Don't judge me!" and "You're just a mommy shamer!" are heard in every mommy group. Anything less than full support of whatever choice a parent may make is considered "bashing" and "shaming". 

And you know what the result is? No one is allowed to speak.

Even positive posts and comments on social media are being twisted into something negative half the time. You can say something you think is nice, or heartwarming, and you will have rabid moms picking apart your words. And if you don't immediately backtrack, and allow yourself to be backed into a corner crying about the offense you committed, you are a "bully" (as you're being bullied) and just a sh*t person. We have taken up a #MobMentality and attack, viciously, anyone who dares to "offend" our delicate sensibilities. How sad...

Don't you EVER share your accomplishments, either. Especially if they happen to be non-mainstream. If you've sucessfully given up spanking? Don't tell anyone. Ever. Because in doing so, you are apparently "shaming" those who have not. 

What I'm saying sounds extreme, doesn't it? But it's the absolute truth of what is really going on. 

And you know what? Dissent amongst the "Mommy Community" is worse than ever. And true progress has been banned by this mindset entirely. 

The tribal mentality has grown, but not in a good way. :-( Instead of bringing mothers together in a unanimous community of love and support, we have alienated one another further, and stunted our own growth.

We are all so afraid to speak, for fear of offending, that we carefully pour over our words repeatedly before hitting "send", or come to the conclusion that we shouldn't say anything at all. Society in general is obsessed with "offensiveness" to the point of stupidity. There, I said it.

I am not advocating for the cruel treatment of our fellow mothers. Nor am I sympathizing with people who are truly just a**holes. The reality is, they will be there regardless of what the majority does. 

But what I AM saying is this - We need to stop claiming the victim title. We need to stop acting like we are entitled to dictate others behaviour with our feelings. We need to stop acting like pansy asses about every little thing. Point blank.

Because this mentality... this perpetually offended, always a victim mind set... this idea that everyone needs to tip toe around your personal feelings bullsh*t... It's hurting society, not helping it. 

#SisterhoodOfMotherhoodMYASS