I am not brave.

I am not brave.

Seems like an odd statement to make, doesn't it?

Well this post is about Natural Childbirth  and the statements that many women who choose it receive from the majority.

One thing I hear too often is, "I'm not brave like you." Or "I couldn't do it."

Well honey, the truth is : I'm not brave.

While sometimes I like to fancy myself a pioneer in correcting what our society has done to birth and mothers... The truth is I don't do it to be brave.

I can't sit here and tell you, "I'm not afraid of the pain at all." Childbirth (for me at least) HURTS. I've had back labor both times so far & it HURT LIKE HELL! (Note : Pain is subjective & many women report painless or even orgasmic births.)

You wouldn't think me "brave" if you had seen me during my last birth. My first all natural...

I cried. I screamed. I whined. I puked. I begged for the pain to go away. Toward the end I even cried out, "Just cut her out of me!" My most common phrase was, "I can't, I can't, I can't, I CAN'T!"

But I did! BUT... it's nothing that MILLIONS of women before me haven't done.

I am not a "special case".

We aren't "crazy".

We aren't masochists.

We aren't doing it to feel superior to others.

Every woman has their own specific reasons, but I can say for me that it's a mix between personal experience & the things I've learned about physiological childbirth & the risks of intervention. I think that's a pretty common lead up to choosing natural birth.

The truth of the matter is : I am more afraid of the risks involved with medicalized birth & interventions - than I am of the pain of natural childbirth.

I am not brave simply because I choose to avoid the unnecessary risks.

And you are more capable than you think!

That's not to say, "You should do it my way!" It simply means that you are so much stronger & more capable than you believe you are! If you wanted to, you could!

Somewhere along the lines birth was over medicalized & women were taught to be terrified of childbirth (& the pain that comes with it). Somehow we got it in our heads that our bodies don't know what they're doing. That childbirth is inherently dangerous. That we can't handle birth without intervention.

None of that is true.

The only thing (barring serious medical problems) standing between you and a natural, intervention free birth is YOU. Your self doubt. Your anxiety. In some cases your ignorance. (Not meant to be an insult. If you're offended, look up the definition of ignorant.) Or just your personal preference. If you truly want a natural birth, the only person stopping you is you.

But that's entirely up to you. How you choose to birth is 100% your choice (again barring medical issues). I'm not here to judge anyone's choices today.

My point is that just because I (& many other women) choose natural childbirth, it doesn't make us any more "brave" than anyone else. We are simply making an educated choice & doing what we think is best for ourselves and our babies.

In the end, isn't that what we're all doing?